On Life, Seasons and The Art of Letting Go

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“As you grow older, adding more years to your ‘years lived’ pile, you learn to respect the seasons of life, you involuntarily teach yourself the art of letting things and people go; of not holding on too tightly.”

My mother said these words to me with a gentle ease as we did random kitchen chores. It was her response to my question as to how, as a mother, she had managed to watch child after child go off to boarding school, graduate from campus, move out of the nest and get married. She said, with time I would learn how to let go; memorize this lesson like the alphabet until the time the words would easily roll out of my tongue without getting stuck.

The….Art of…..Letting... Go

Indeed we have to live to learn, if life was to teach me this lesson a few months ago, I would not have paid attention, because in denial I was once that person. Yes, that person who held on to things for too long, to friendships even when they had long died a hundred deaths. That person who gave people and situations chances; numerous chances, when what I should have done is walk away. And right now if you have a visual image of a woman saying goodbye, walking away but looking back one more time, that was also me. I was that person, up until that Saturday afternoon, seated on the floor in my room, with two boxes; one marked ‘KEEP’ and the other ‘THROW’, placed in front of me.

That day as I tried to get rid of what I didn’t need to make room for more, I learned an important life lesson; The Art of Letting Go. As I emptied drawers and unpacked bags, I found years worth of things. Some irreplaceable; reminding me of people, places, good and bad experiences of the past and others, well, others were just memories neatly tucked away in between doggy ear journals and in the back of long forgotten faded jeans.

Later on as I watched the contents in the THROW box burn, I unconsciously took inventory of my life; Were there things; like those I had cleared from my house, I was hanging on to even when I didn’t need anymore? Were there dead situations preventing me from moving forward? People I needed to stop dancing ‘two-step’ with and say goodbye to? Were there things that were filling up my life that needed to throw in order to make space for the new?

The Art….of Letting….Go

As I thought about these questions, I also thought about you and the awkward long silences we’ve been trying to fill with questions about the weather, where there used to be laughter and conversations deprived of commas. But now I understand. In life there are things and people we are meant to hang on to for the long haul while others but for a short season and I finally learnt the difference between the two.

The Art of Letting…. Go

I’m partly sad that our season ended but partly happy that the memories remain despite our current transitions in life. That’s why I no longer beat myself up because I’m unable to share with you every intricate detail of my life; of secret admirers and dreams or feel bad when we don’t talk for months on end. It’s okay. Like the other goodbyes I said this year, it happened to us. Seasons changed. I changed. You changed. We changed. And i finally learnt..

The Art of Letting Go.